Tango Dancing With My Ego by Heidi Michelle
You know hose dreams you've tucked away in the dark corner of your closet? Perhaps it's time to let in some light and give them their due attention. Shall we dance?
I hope this finds you well and peaceful as you step into 2016.
It’s been a grand time of change for me this last year as I have recently transitioned from my role in management at Selva Armonia Retreat Center into one of teaching only, and taking my teachings further into the world.
Sharing yoga is my passion. I feel blessed to be doing this work full-time and grateful for the capable team that has stepped in behind me, taking Selva to new heights in serving its growing community.
Stepping off of the ledge of security from a full-time position, however, was spooky! I knew I needed to do it, yet the ground before me was seemingly un-sure and unsafe.
What if I fail?
It’s in these times that the rubber yoga mat meets the proverbial gravel road. This is the time when I am truly Living Yoga. It’s easy to be blissed out when things are steady and safe.
My life was taking a turn into the unknown. I could have recoiled in fear, succumbed to the inner voices telling me I wasn’t ready and clung to the security of that thick and sturdy tree trunk called “a job.”
Instead, I am boldly inching my way out onto the skinny branches, where things are a bit shaky, clearly stating my desires and intentions and taking action toward their manifestation. Low and behold, the “big scary world” is instead a feather comforter, welcoming my presence and beckoning me into its sensually supportive embrace.
To trust ourselves is a life-long tango dance with our egos. The ego-mind is a tricksy friend. It tells us stories about ourselves that don’t always hold water. As yogis, we thus learn to dance. It can be a push / pull power game. But it’s much more fun to glide gracefully together across the dance-floor of our inner landscapes, holding lightly to our precious and necessary egos and feeling when to lead and when to let go.
In the meditation and contemplative practices of yoga, we practice observation. Observation of the mind’s ripples of disruption, our thoughts, feelings, emotions, actions and words. We are the observer and the observed, releasing judgments in order to understand ourselves intimately.
Observing myself go through this transition has been enlightening and humbling. Many a moment I’ve spent calming the disturbances of my mind through meditation, journaling, movement, asana and action.
I have learned much.
A new year is a wonderful time to dare yourself. Those dreams you’ve tucked away in the dark corner of your closet? Perhaps it’s time to let in some light and give them their due attention.
Do the thing that scares you. Dare yourself. Be gentle with yourself and go for it.
You will rise to meet your spirit’s calling. You are capable or the dream wouldn’t niggle you so.
I wish for you the most healthy, satisfying and peaceful year.
Namaste, Heidi Michelle