“I don’t know what I think until I write it.” ~ Joan Didion
I am grieving. I turn 50 today.
That’s not why I’m grieving.
For the honor of my half-century Earth-day, I feel grateful and vibrant.
A gnarling beneath is begging to be acknowledged.
There is a grief that squeezes my heart, empties my stomach, and has salty water on my cheeks several times each day. The result of a reality I’m turning face-front toward. I am mourning. I am sad to the core of my being.
Whew, summer sure was an active time. Backyard gatherings, festivals, travels… this time is usually full of activity and social output. Depending on where you are in the Northern hemisphere, I’m sure you’re feeling the chill in the air these days. The mornings are crisp and the night creeps on a lot faster than it did last month. Autumn is here and darkness is descending. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself turning into a bit of a homebody. It is completely natural and OK
We’ve all heard the eight glasses a day rule when it comes to water intake and I’m sure you’ve noticed the steady rise in people toting giant water containers around like designer handbags (some with designer prices). However, staying hydrated is more than a health trend, it’s vital to overall health and wellness. “Why is it so important?!” you ask. Well, our body is up to 60% water, our blood is 90% water and our brain up to 85%. That’s a lot of water. Just imagine, with so
Heidi Michelle giving "hands on" support during Savasana, Corpse Pose. Savasana is the final posture we practice in a Yoga series. This is a time of integration and relaxation before rising up to meet the world. Remember that one time in Savasana when the space between your ears really did empty? Remember how it felt to rest your mind in between your thoughts, as if deep space were really inside your own head?
Remember how your body felt? Like it was literally melting into
Upon returning to the United States from my annual sojourn to Costa Rica about a month ago, I found myself quite challenged by life. Several circumstances had arose that left me questioning and re-evaluating, well, just about every corner of my inner and outer world. A fog descended upon me. Life lost its luster. I felt forlorn and empty. It took me a while to realize (and admit) that I was downright depressed. I know you can relate. Whoever you are, wherever you sit, I k
The holidays can be challenging or magical for all types of relationships. Whether it be those family members we see twice a year, or our beloved live-in partners, this time of the year our relationship “triggers” for suffering may be as raw and on-the-surface as those crystalline snowflakes powder-coating a still lake. Staying in peaceful balance and out of the dangerous, frozen waters of conflict requires a light and mindful approach. As yogis with expanded awareness, w
Radical change requires radical determination... If you voted this week wanting radical change and you now think the results fumbled that plan, think again. If you voted this week expecting a fresh, shiny new outcome for humanity and are angry because those ideals now seems impossible, think again. If you want radical change, go ahead and get radical, already. But, get radical with yourself, please. There are likely things that you know with 100% certainty need to change in
Now, I’m no doctor and would never claim to be a expert in nutrition, but I’ve been reading (and eating) for many-a-year. The idea that a fatty diet leads to more fat and weight gain has long since been disproved. It is widely known today that many of the myths around the dangers of eating good fats are just that, myths. “Facts” debunked. In fact, we’re finding that the opposite is true. Fat is good. We crave it. Moreover, we actually need healthy fat for a healthy body
You know hose dreams you've tucked away in the dark corner of your closet? Perhaps it's time to let in some light and give them their due attention. Shall we dance? I hope this finds you well and peaceful as you step into 2016. It’s been a grand time of change for me this last year as I have recently transitioned from my role in management at Selva Armonia Retreat Center into one of teaching only, and taking my teachings further into the world. Sharing yoga is my passion. I
Landing in Costa Rica this week for my fifth winter has got me thinking… Why does everybody and their mothers come to freakin’ Costa Rica? And why do I love it so darn much? Yogis, tourists and ex-patriots flock to this tiny military-free country exponentially, setting up homes, getting yoga teaching certified and dreaming of their return. The world-wide community is recognizing Costa Rica as a uniquely special place. But, why? I’ll tell you what it is for me. It’s the nat
I wish for you a year of plenty of what makes you happy.
I wish for us a breakthrough in how we treat each other on this Earth.
I wish for everlasting peace in each heart that beats.
I wish for universal kindness to be the answer to all conflict. The beginning of a new year is an obvious time to reflect upon our lives and set about fine tuning the way we move through the world. Bringing awareness to what is important to us can guide our choices. Our words and actions stem
Today is a holiday here in Mexico. We are celebrating the Mexican Revolution of 1910, when brave Mexican people armed themselves to physically fight against their oppressors, leading to an independent state. This morning over coffee, the topic of revolution spurred an enlightening conversation among my multi-national friends. Questions arose, conclusions emerged and perhaps a glimmer of useful wisdom beheld for the benefit of all. If we may... In today’s era, what does
As published in Yoganonamous, September, 2015 December 2015 marks my fifth season living and working in Costa Rica. I am a yoga teacher. I am not a surfer. Yet. I have been on a surfboard. I’ve paddled like a fiend out amongst the waves to float in belly-down bliss on top of a surfboard in warm ocean water, waiting for the perfect wave, my internal dialogue something like, “Okay, girl. You can do this. Take your time and go for it!” I have managed to turn myself around, no
I sat with a friend in dismay recently. She shared her sadness with me. She told me that she’s feeling purposeless, that she’s not “doing enough” and feels that this is stripping away her self-worth. It is a common human dilemma, this feeling of un-worthy-ness. As if our worth depends upon our proving our value to the right people at the right time. I know this dilemma well. “If only he loved me/chose me, I would be worthy/happy.”
“If only I had that dream job, I would be wor
I straddle that proverbial fence when it comes to the ever-so-popular pursuit of “self love.” To sit with the sole intention of cultivating self love has proven a worthless endeavor. I find I like & respect myself most when I’ve done a good deed, been in integrity with my values or enjoyed a long bike ride. At times, I practice squaring up with myself in the mirror, gazing into my own eyes and saying, “I love you,” with sincerity. Sometimes it feels genuine. Oftentimes, it
It was daring. I was bold. It didn’t hurt. I thought it would. That was the story I had been telling myself for all of these years since the pain began. “I don’t do that to myself. I’m smart. I take care of my body,” I repeated, goodness knows how many umpteen times until it became my truth.
In my morning yoga practice today, I busted my own myth. For the very first time in about 10 years, I did a full Wheel Pose, Urdhva Dhanuarasana. I have had a blame/hate relationship wit
A 7-day Transformational Journey It was believed, in the not too distant past, that we could not change our brains once they were fully developed. That in our mid-twenties, when our brains are more or less fully formed, we’re stuck with it. What you’ve got is what you’ve got, essentially, and that your particular twenty-something brain, with its existing neuro-pathways, configurations and functioning, is what you’re stuck with for the remainder or your long life. The s
(Heidi Michelle's private yoga lesson with yoga teacher, Kisa Davison, a specialist in scoliosis and compassionate guide in Kalispell, Montana) My scoliosis is progressing. My healer/body worker of 6 years died a year-and-a-half ago. I’ve been in back pain again and haven’t known what to do. More yoga? Rolfing? Physical Therapy? A rain dance? I’m at an impasse in my body and I need help. Last week, I found it. I found a woman who specializes in scoliosis and is a yoga teac
The prospect of one’s imminent death is ever-present.
It is one of the hardest things for us to contemplate.
It’s unavoidable, as far as we know.
Truth is, we don’t know how long we have in these bodies,
or even in these bodies in their present states of being.
Life is but a flicker.
Made longer by deeply noticing the colors of our loved ones irises.
We will not always have this skill. ~ Heidi Michelle
Namaste, Human Family. #HowHealthyCanWeGet
I received the letter. I cried. We can never know the impact we have on another. I thought we had simply been traveling together, having a great time and becoming friends. Little did I know how keenly she had been observing me, my choices and habits. Lianette Laria and I met at Wanderlust Yoga Festival in Lake Tahoe the summer of 2013. We found ourselves traveling through Yosemite together for a few days post-festival and have become fast friends. Later, she sent me the